Reflections from a Child and Family Therapist… It’s June and that means it’s time to celebrate Pride Month! Pride is a time to celebrate diverse genders and sexual orientations and commemorate the work people have done to ensure LGBTQ people can live openly and freely without discrimination. For parents, Pride Month is also a good
I hear you, mamma. I do. You feel you’re not “good enough.” That you aren’t putting in enough effort. Your house isn’t spotless, your children yell or throw tantrums, they struggle to learn, they don’t sleep through the night. In the pursuit of ‘perfect parenthood,’ all eyes are set on the children. In truth, the
Consider this: During childhood and adolescence, your kids may spend more time around each other than any other peer or family member! And with all of the time spent at home in the last year, sibling one-on-one time has been at an all-time high for many families. While some kids may enjoy spending more quality
Emotional meltdowns commonly frustrate parents and seem hard to understand, prevent, and manage. Children often lose control of their emotions when they can’t verbalize their needs. Their irritation, frustration, and anger build up until they reach a tipping point. When the intensity of children’s emotions becomes too much for their nervous system to handle, the thinking
With the pandemic, many things have moved online. Is your child’s brain fried by the end of the school day? Do they try to decompress by playing video games, watching YouTube videos, or browsing Instagram? This kind of break may feel natural, but research has shown that kids and teens who spend a lot of
Over and over I hear from parents who feel like the life has been drained out of them before they’ve even made it through their morning coffee. Kids are sluggish and full of complaints from the moment they open their eyes; parents are nagging and panicking about being late (again); the whole family is angry
As your kids get ready to go back to school (or resume online school), do you wonder what more you can do to help them succeed academically or thrive socially? In her updated 2017 version of her book, Mindset, Carol Dweck, the psychologist who researched and coined the terms “growth mindset” and “fixed mindset,”cautions us that
Hi. How are you? Like… really? Are you struggling as much as most parents right now? Look. I know you’re worried about your kid(s). I’ll give you some ideas for them, too. I’m pretty concerned about you right now though. The expectations on you are confusing and more than they should be. You know, your
Oh, mama. I see you… tangled up in a mess of emotions and putting on a brave face for the kids. Closing yourself in the bathroom in an effort to shelter your children from the eruption of emotion that is bubbling and threatening just under the surface. Trying hard to smile and show interest in yet-another-kid-inspired
Social media is a dangerous place to hang out if you’re trying to avoid anxiety-provoking content at the moment. In particular, there’s been such contradictory advice about parenting during the pandemic. And it’s coming from every angle. Meanwhile, parents have found themselves very suddenly coping with their own waves of overwhelming emotions while also simultaneously
I didn’t understand– most of us didn’t– exactly how it would feel to prepare for a pandemic to sweep through. On Friday afternoon our team naturopathic physician, Dr. Sage, attended a special seminar hosted by the Arizona Department of Health Services about COVID-19 (aka. Novel Coronavirus). On Monday, Dr. Sage and I began putting together
If your children (and you) sleep through the night, you are the envy of parents everywhere! So many things can get in the way of getting a consistently good night’s rest– overstimulation, anxiety, depression, difficulty with making transitions, etc. Maybe your sweetie pie repeatedly begs for one more drink of water, worries about the next
My kids had a day off of school last month in honor of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. It was a natural opportunity for us to talk about who Dr. King was and why his tireless activism was so important. One thing led to another and we were deep in conversation about motivations for racism.
It’s a new year and a new decade. For many people, that means it’s resolution time. It’s finding-yourself time. It’s creating-new-habits-and-setting-goals time. Maybe you’re one of the few who make your dreams come true at the start of each new year, but most of us live a different reality. Depending on the source, surveys suggest
I can accept that parenting my kids can be a thankless job; however, watching them respond (or not respond) to others’ kindnesses can really put me on edge. I practically hold my breath when their gratitude is slow to show up. Those two little words, “thank you,” sure can be a relief to hear. While
Many would argue that technology has made instant connection to others increasingly easy. Yet, in the last two decades, the amount of people reporting that they don’t have a trusted confidant has increased threefold. How can this be? It seems that there may be an illusion of connection when the number of online “friends” is
There are things I spend a fair amount of time worrying about in my professional work. As a psychologist and director of a child and family wellness center, I worry about whether families feel supported; about overscheduled lives limiting opportunities for connection; about the stress hormones resulting from the hurry-hurry-do-everything attitude of our society causing
Once upon a time, families of the neighborhood looked out for one another’s kids; sent a casserole down the street when their neighbor was down on their luck; called upon the mama with a new baby; and confidently sent their kids down the block for a cup of sugar from the neighbor. The days of
I have always been an observer. This tendency doesn’t stop with people-watching. As a child, I was fortunate enough to live near a nationally-ranked well-funded zoo. For a period of time, I was certain zoology was the field for me. I remember standing gape-mouthed at my local zoo as young gorillas pulled off impressive gymnastic-quality
About 70 years ago, the psychiatrist Dr. John Bowlby made a surprising revelation about mental health. He stated that it is dependent on each of us experiencing a “warm, intimate and continuous relationship” in which both child and caregiver “find satisfaction and enjoyment.” Dr. Bowlby’s findings led him to develop the science of attachment– which
